Wednesday 30 September 2020

Day 198 of self-isolation - Pugh, Pugh, Barney McGrew, Cuthbert, Dibble, Grubb

Pugh, Pugh, Barney McGrew, Cuthbert, Dibble, Grubb

71 deaths and 7143 new cases. It's rising horribly fast. 7143 is the worst number we've ever had. There's a lag between new cases and deaths of 2-3 weeks, and the number of new cases we had then was about 3000. So this is going to get a lot worse before it gets better.

Spain and France are also seeing disappointing numbers.

And the rules are so complicated that even our oven-ready Boris can't get them right. Does it have to be so complicated that people can't understand what they're supposed to do?

I accept that we're in a difficult situation, and we can't do a simple "lock down for everyone" like we did last spring. But how about this.

Set up seven different sets of rules, and make them as simple as possible, These different sets of rules would be for the various situations that can apply in various regions of the country.

So you have defcon 1 (no restrictions) up to defcon 7 (total lockdown). Defcon 2 to 6 would have various restrictions, carefully spelled out on the government web site.

Then you would simply announce "Camberwick Green is now at defcon 3, but will move to defcon 5 from Friday." And there would be an app, and a map on the government web site, that showed the defcon levels for each area. So, if Boris visits Camberwick Green, before he goes he checks out the defcon level, and when he's asked, he can answer using the defcon number, and if anyone wants them explained, he refers them to the government web site.




  1. I’m afraid there's a serious error here. The fire service never featured in Camberwick Green. They were in Trumpton, led by the frustrated Captain Flack who 'never had a real fire' and frequently scolded his team for unnecessarily deploying the hose - 'No, not the hose!'. Firefighting services in Camberwick Green were provided by the soldiers of Pippin Fort under Captain Snort.

    I expect that Mr Clamp the greengrocer would make deliveries, probably aided by the fire brigade, and that Miss Lovelace would still be able to walk her Pekes.

  2. My first draft was Trumpton, but I thought that the first five letters might be misunderstood.

  3. Sounds like world beating, oven ready health secretary may be going for a system such as that you suggest.

    1. Apparently, the first thing he does each day is read my blog to find out what he needs to do next.

      It's an awesome responsibility.